I found all that I could ever want, wrapped in something I could never have.

I think I need to get my brain to accept the fact that promos are in 6 weeks. Oh, joy. ): And I really need to do well, which means I've got to get down to studying pronto. 

I wonder what makes people so sure of themselves. I probably need that. 

I've been tellin' my dreams to the scarecrow

'Bout the places that I'd like to see

I said, friend do you think I'll ever get there

Ah, but he just stands there smilin' back at me

- Born to Fly, Sara Evans

this is a very happy picture :))

Kk gonna continue doing math now. DISCIPLINEEEE

you're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul.

'I sometimes find, and I am sure you know the feeling, that I simply have too many thoughts and memories crammed into my mind. At these times, I use the Pensieve.  One simply siphons the excess thoughts from one's mind, pours them into the basin, and examines them at one's leisure.' - Dumbledore

Hmm I think I really need a Pensieve. If only it did exist. All the thoughts zooming around in my head really need to be let out.

I'm really glad this past week is over. Tiring is, as usual, an understatement. But but I had so much fun this week, and I really wouldn't trade the memories for anything else. Like dancing with all the crazy csl people in front of the second-floor mirrors on monday. (Yes, mirrors.) Hehe that was about the most embarrassing thing ever but still it was so much fun. Although I guess I really don't have any dancing genes in me ohman.

And watching the teller and the tale with lingzhi the birthday gal on thursday. Going to acjc really just brought back all the memories with becky and there's something about the acjc campus that's really calming. And the show was really great, I'm so thankful to becky for introducing me to drama and I'm definitely gonna make plans to watch more shows by acsian theatre.

And after ISLE concert last night I guess it really hit me that I do love ISLE very much and my entire team too. Maybe I had a ton of misgivings at first, but right now, I'm feeling so glad for ISLE. I really can't wait for more to come. you never know how many hearts you touch~~

Have got a ton of work to finish but I'm a happy kid right now and nothing, not even work, can spoil this moment. All the lectures this week have been so taxing on the brain cells, hmm gosh they don't regenerate so I hope I haven't been losing too many. I still need them for all the exams coming up. SO INTENSEEEEE.

aww :)

13,

just stop for a minute and smile.

I'm finally back here again. So, the holidays have ended, school has started again, life has gone on. For the first time ever, I can't say I'm enjoying rj very much. Whatever happened to the days when I actually loved school, loved my friends, loved (almost) everything in my life. Don't get me wrong, I still love school very much, and I'm truly thankful for every opportunity that I have, but oh my goodness why is it that there are so many things that get on my nerves these days.


RJ is so much more materialistic, I swear. Everything revolves around numbers and numbers. If touching one person's life is a good thing, then touching one hundred lives must be a really great thing. I don't think it works that way, though. And if all the numbers and certs and diplomas don't already give some a major headache, others have to make it worse by rambling on and on about it. Hmm I think what sets some people apart from the masses (and I really respect such people) is the way they are able to see beyond all these tangible things in life to the not so tangible. And these people are just so genuine, so admirable, that they are so hard to come by.


To tell the truth, the next few weeks are gonna be pretty daunting. But I'm just gonna keep believing. And staying true to all my true friends. :D OKAY I'M GONNA FIND SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO EVERYDAY.

two is better than one :)

hello June, I'm so glad you're here.

If it really didn't matter, you wouldn't be spending so much time thinking about it.

So many things have happened and I have been putting off giving an update, so now I have no idea where to begin. But it's the hols now. Though there's so much catching up to be done, the only thing I've actually been catching up on so far is sleep hehe. But it's crazy how a quarter of JC life's now behind us, if I thought sec 4 passed by real fast, this must be the speed of an airplane, srsly. 

It's funny how when we were struggling through a late night rushing out a tutorial, or trying not to fall asleep in class, time seemed to drag on forever. But now, when we actually want time to slow down (SLOW DOWN ALREADY YOU HEAR ME), it doesn't listen. What I need now is a big red backward button that I can press to experience everything all over again, even the late nights, even the falling asleep in class. But there have been many little moments worth remembering and there are wonderful people in my life that I'll remember even if things change and we don't wave to each other along the corridors anymore. <3 I guess it's never that easy to forget people.   

The hols so far have been great, been trying to fit in some revision here and there. Why why why are exams in three weeks, I'm totally not in the mood for any studying, which is why I'm making really slow progress. Sigh. There's just so many things and people that I want to find time for. Oh yeah I was making a scrapbook the other day and GOSHHH I REALLY DO MISS BECKY SO MUCH. Haha okay fine it doesn't make any bit of sense but it just reminded me of all the scrapping I did for becky teeheehee. 

I really look up to people who have so many friends in their lives and yet can still find time for every single one of them. I wonder how they do it. 

OKAY OKAY. MATH CALLS. I THINK MY NEW BEST FRIEND IS MATH ISN'T THAT AWESUMMM :D :D

I wanna let all the sunshine into my life~

<3 <3

you paint the sky a crimson red

I walked across the crowded street.
A sea of eyes, they cut through me.
And I saw you in the middle.
Your upset face, you wear it well.
You camouflage the way you feel,
When everything's the matter.

We've all been down that road before.
Searching for that something more.
World's spinning 'round.
There's no sign of slowing down.
So won't you take a breath?
Just take a breath.

People change and promises are broken.
Clouds can move and skies will be wide open.
Don't forget to take a breath.

Blink our eyes, life's rearranged.
To our surprise, it's still okay.
It's the way things happen.
Summer comes and then it goes.
Hold on tight, and brace for cold.
And it's only for a moment.

These lyrics kinda describe my thoughts right now. It's like just when you think everything's perfect for that split second, it slips right out of your hands. And leaves you to wonder whether it was just a figment of your imagination after all. You move on though. But following that, everything's just normal. Because you've seen that perfect moment for yourself and nothing after that can ever come close to it. But there are so many moments in life still worth remembering though. 

Yes, back to reality, currently I have about a thousand and one things to do, but then being the unmotivated little brat I am today, the only thing I feel like doing now is sleeping. Which is technically one of the things on my to-do list heh. Gotta study for the bio lecture test next week. AND complete math and chem tutorials. And refine gpp and all that too. AHHH you know, if only my life didn't revolve around such stuff all the time, I honestly think I would be a much happier person. Need some sorta escape right about now, seriously, before everything actually drives me insane. Hawaii is definitely out of the question. So is Antartica. Though I think I might actually enjoy Antartica seeing that the weather has been getting on my nerves so bad these past few days. Hmm or maybe I should pack myself in a crate like those animals in Madagascar and see where the ocean takes me. Okay okay fine I'm kidding, it'll never work, not in a million years.

I was reading through my old livejournal and it got me thinking about things the way they used to be. I remember there was a time last year when certain people were so obsessed with Yale and certain others were so obsessed with Harvard hahahaha. Those times feel like a million light years ago. WHY IS JC SO DIFFERENT D: It's like an entirely different world with entirely different people. Even I feel different. I think my brain needs more time to get a grip on things. I feel like I need to talk to lingzhi more, when I'm talking to her, it feels like it's back to old times again. 

yes, I believe.

and now our adrenaline's rushing,

Oh my, CTs are coming soon. If that's supposed to freak me out, it's doing a very good job. A better job than I'd like to admit actually. And if it's any comfort, june hols are fast approaching too. Seriously, things are happening way too fast for my poor incompetent mind to process. Just a year and a half more and we would be thrown defenseless into the real world, having to make tough decisions. Oh well, I can't say I'm looking forward much to that. Going off to uni is another issue altogether, something I thought about so much last year but haven't had the time to these days. Hmm I'm getting a little sidetracked by the future. For now, the present calls. 

Well, currently, I'm pretty much confused by everything that's been happening in my life such that my mind has been in this jumbled state for the longest time. I have a terrible tendency to overthink and over-analyse things and it's not doing much for my sanity. And to top it all off, I'm so exhausted. As far as I know, the worst feeling in the world now is wanting to sleep but not being able to. I suspect it's been messing up my body clock but oh well. Anyway, I've been thinking (Oh my I need to stop thinking so much) whether I'm actually happy with who I am. Okay wait I'm making myself sound incredibly weird here but I'm really not. It's just that I've been letting myself hide in people's shadows lately and I fear it's becoming second nature or something. Haha I just conjured up an image of a Cheshire cat. Don't get me wrong, I definitely do not creep up on people. I'm just scared that I might appear to be as fleeting as the Cheshire cat to people. 

Okay okay all this thinking has got to go. Sheesh I've been telling myself that like only a million times.

On to much happier stuff, I met lynn today and she happily told me that sports fest is on 27th may this year and just about persuaded me to go back for it. It made me think back to those happy richard days and the cheering and screaming and all. Miss it so much. On a sidenote, I should be scared for tomorrow. Or should I say, later today.

more than ever now.

♥. And I really, really mean it, I swear. 
Class camp was one awesome experience. It's amazing how much I learnt about everyone and how much my perception of everything has changed. Though the cabins were really disgusting and the roof leaked on us more than a few times, I guess if I had to choose between school and ophir, I would choose ophir any day. Waterfall scrambling and abseiling and everything more than made up for the horror of the cabins and the toilets. (Haha I can still distinctly picture the look on everyone's faces at the state of the toilets.) And it was definitely 3E that made all the difference, looking back now, I really wouldn't have it any other way.  

love is a river I wanna keep flowing,

we're on the top of the world;

cabin no. 1!

It wasn't a mistake after all. Thank you :)