trying to be brave. and failing,

Studying has come to a point where diminishing marginal returns have set in. So I am posting to get my mind off econs for a little while.

I really miss childhood innocence, it seems as if  the world appears colder and harsher as you get older. Absolutely not ready to face the world, people may be fighting dragons, but I can't even wield a sword. Been making mistakes and not even trying to pick up the pieces. Torn between ignoring people and just looking them in the eye and giving it all way. It's a tough choice but when you've got just that split second, you never do anything right. Decisions, decisions. And making them gets us through life bit by bit. 

Instead of dreaming of pretty horses galloping into sunsets, I'm reciting the Krebs cycle in my head when I sleep. There is something seriously flawed about this system, I just can't put a finger on it. 

Building more and more walls that I don't think I'll ever break down. But inside I'm dying to know what's on the other side. And whether there's a chance. No, there's always a chance, it's whether you choose to take it that makes all the difference.

Is there anything worth remembering, other than the Krebs cycle, or market failures? Maybe not.

The Dark Alley, by Verna

You were framed up in that dark alley,
The alley, where all alleys converge,
The alley of
Her heart.


You cast that glow, that sliver of light, and it
Went cascading down
And down.


The light that sneaked into her morning routine,
The light that snatched her frowns and replaced them with smiles,
The light that was brighter than a hundred light bulbs put together.
That light.
Was you.


But out went the light,
Out went her smiles,
And out went her heart.
That alley was never this dark.


You are still framed up in that dark alley,
Collecting dust.
She did not throw out the frame,
It's still there.
You're still there
In the alley of
Her heart.


---




Just a poem I wrote. Haven't written one in ages, but I suddenly felt like writing one. I know it's not very good, but maybe, just maybe, I haven't lost it yet heh. And now I shall go back to studying Mitosis and Meiosis.

The girl who felt too much and said too little.

12 more days to promos. Revision was progressing really well during the hols until WHAM the hols were over and school came back with a resounding bang, driving us back to reality again. School has a way of doing that and it's sometimes quite frustrating, really. 

But I'm so glad I managed to finish chem and math revision during the hols. My brain is still in knots from all the differentiating and integrating, seriously. Bio is taking too much time, it'll probably take up the whole of this week. Which leaves econs and gp to next week. But you know what, nothing ever goes according to plan. Just saying. Gahh I really hate myself when I'm being so pessimistic. Am desperately trying to find a bright side now, but I can't seem to be able to find it. Just when I really need a bright side too. )):

HELLO MR BRGHT SIDE WHERE ARE YOUUUU.

as if it's ever that easy to ):